DEAR UNILEVER...

Dear Unilever, 

Congratulations.

No really, I mean it. You have managed to cap the number of calories in your ice cream* to just 250 calories. *T&C’s: only applies to “adult single-serve ice cream” (bad luck Ben & Jerry’s).  

Consumers across the globe are high-fiving your Sustainable Living Plan and ability to look after human health. We can finally eat more, and feel less guilty about it. That’s not strictly true though is it… you’re just making portion sizes smaller. 

I sympathise. I know exactly how hard it is to naturally reduce calories and sugar in ice cream. It took me 25 months! Everyone (including some of your employees) told me it couldn’t be done and I should give up. 

Why couldn’t your employees have given me the golden ticket? The beautiful nugget of wisdom? All they needed to say was “Charlie, reduce the size of the portion by 33% and bingo”. It would have saved me years of painstaking development.  But I guess you wanted to keep this eureka moment for yourself… fair enough. Who knew, and I’m not even good at maths, if you eat a 1/3 as much then you also cut your calories by a 1/3. Genius. If that’s not a press release then what is.

What you haven’t told the consumer is that not only are you cutting calories but you’re also reducing your manufacture costs whilst boosting profits, and all with the veil of philanthropically looking after consumer health. Ahh the privileges of being one of the big dogs. Truly, congratulations. 

Food manufacturers have a responsibility for consumer health. We should all be on a mission to fuse health with indulgence so consumers can indulge without looking like they have, spoil ourselves without spoiling ourselves. At Oppo we are thrilled you have finally realised that health is important. I implore you though – don’t be lazy, don’t take the easy option, don’t just sell us short - start from scratch and reformulate from the bottom up, re-create your ice cream – it doesn’t need to be laden with sugar and additives - Oppo has proved that. Yes it costs more, but we believe product is king, and consumer health is of greater importance still. 

What you have done is prove Oppo’s entire proposition: people want great tasting foods, with fewer calories and sugar. Our mission is to prove that health AND indulgence can go hand in hand. Consumers shouldn’t have to choose between tasteless health food and unhealthy junk. We, as manufacturers, must continue innovating so consumer needs are met. The world’s healthiest luxury dairy ice cream is just the start for Oppo. 

Kind regards,

 

Charlie & Harry

P.s. We’ll let you into a secret… Oppo contains just 80 calories per portion, 6g of sugars opposed to your 25g, and we didn’t even have to cut the pack in half. 

 

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